I once had this conversation with this Indian guy whom I’ve never met. He saw my pics on facebook, congratulated me on my big boobs and went on to pester me about having phone or cyber sex with him. I wasted no time in telling him off. He was being rude and assuming. His apologies were that he liked what he saw (no doubt) and couldn’t control himself. Going on to say that girls have more sexual control than guys. So I asked him if he’d ever had sex with an animal. He said no and added that I was being funny.
I asked him that, not because I wanted to be rude, but I wondered if he’d ever had a strong urge; an urge so strong that he had to grab a goat because he couldn’t find any regular pussy nearby.
Males can’t control themselves sexually is total bullshit. I think that phrase was conjured by men who lacked discipline and amounted to nothing in life. Let me give a scenario. Let’s say a man and woman and are going at like crazy. Clothes are already coming off and things are bound to end south. He’s hard. Then the girl manages to pull apart with a small smile.
‘I have something to say’ she says.
The guy winces in apparent agony. ‘Do you have to say it now?’
‘Yes’ she answers apologetic. ‘I just couldn’t continue without letting you know. You see I tested HIV positive last week. Even though we are going to use protection, I just thought I should let you know.’
The guy scans her face. Is she kidding? But she’s dead serious. ‘What!’
No guy, how far-gone he was would just continue and shrug it off because he can’t control himself. Maybe that seems a little far-fetched. What about your mum walks in unexpectedly right in the middle of sex?
I hear guys have egos. The kind that makes them walk over their wives. That makes them seek attention outside to fulfill selfish desires and fantasies. They want to look good, stand straight and appear tough. And one of the evidence is promiscuity. You are a man, you can handle it.
Male ego is just an exaggerated piece of shit. Sure, males have their pride and seek attention, but the swag that has been attached to arrogance, pride, word-abuse and the right to flirt or cheat all in the name of ego is annoying. Male ego is like the Cinderella story. Something we have conditioned our minds to believe until it becomes a norm. A norm without potent value. Everyone wants to be an Alpha male. If male ego that allows cheating was such a good thing, why is cheating done in confidence and secrecy? Why does it bring much heartache to the woman?
Men argue that after childbirth or some years, the woman may no longer be looking as beautiful and radiant as before. Hey asshole, marriage is for men not boys. Men who can weather any condition. You knew what you were going into in the marriage. Deal with it.
Men give different excuses for general weakness, such that we are coming to accept it as ‘that’s the way they are wired.’ Bullshit. If I 100% in a relationship, I expect it back. If I give love and fidelity, I want it returned. The ‘he’s just being a man’ mentality that has chopped most part of our brains, weakens the woman resolve to declare full ownership of her husband. After all he’s a man. He’s bound to cheat.
Society has also made it difficult for women who want to leave if they discover he’s cheating. ‘How would you want to leave your husband because he cheated? Nobody would respect you as a single woman and parent. The man is the respect a woman has!’ I also don’t blame those who can’t just walk away especially if they have kids to consider. It takes a very strong woman to raise 2-4 kids on her own especially if she is not widowed.
Some have pointed out that a woman has no reason to leave if the cheats as long as he is still taking care of her. If you’ve ever given someone that kind of advice, then you don’t even know the first thing about marriage. Marriage is firstly for companionship. God saw that Adam was alone and had to give him someone so he won’t be lonely.
I don’t support cheating in marriage under any circumstances. You can go online and google up a thousand reasons why men cheat, but none holds any substance. A man has no right, no excuse whatsoever to cheat on his wife.
If you can’t stay faithful, stay single.